Dumb!

I've seen a couple ice fisherfolk out on Lake Esau in the past few days.  With all the warm weather we've had, I can't imagine that the ice is very thick.  Being out there in this weather seems like the northern Michigan version of playing in traffic.

Speaking of thin ice, on Monday Patrick, the township supervisor and manager of the Presque Isle Fire Department, described a situation which developed a couple days earlier on Grand Lake, the large lake immediately west of Lake Esau.  It seems that one of the local residents decided to take his daughter on a jaunt on the lake in his ATV.  After driving around awhile, he started breaking through the ice and called for help.  PIFD responded, and Patrick called a couple other departments for assistance.

Over the driver's objections, the fire fighters got this man's daughter to land.  Then they ordered the driver to abandon his vehicle.  He refused initially, and only relented when Patrick told him the only alternative was to have "the man in the brown uniform", i.e., the sheriff's deputy in attendance, come out onto the ice, arrest him, and take him off to jail.

The firefighters tried using ropes to extract the ATV, but they could not move it.  So, two tow trucks were called.  They used their winches to drag the vehicle to shore, but were never able to get it up onto the ice because the ice was barely two inches thick!

As Patrick and the deputy watched the operation from shore, the deputy finally sputtered, "There's no fixing dumb!"  Then they noticed that the driver was standing immediately behind them — but it's unclear if this guy understood what the deputy's comment meant.  What is clear is that the driver will have to consult with the DNR to determine if any gasoline or other contaminants were released into the lake, and if so, what remediation of the lake water will cost.  Yes, there's no fixing dumb. •••